Check this out!

Read my Family blog for a funny story and yet something profound all at the same time. The entry is entitled Socks...what else might we hold on to that isn't profiting anything or fixing anything?

Boy am I a mess

I messed up yesterday.

Big time...I literally exploded.

I think I've been holding in resentment and anger subconsiously for a long time.

I burst.

I acted in an unloving, unlikeable way, I was cruel and pushed and pushed and pushed.

And I liked it....I enjoyed the rush I got off of it.

And then I thought about what I did.

I didn't like myself so much anymore.

In fact, I was ashamed of myself.

I acted in a manner so unlike anything I thought I was.

I broke.

I'm crying out to God and asking for help.

I'm going to seek some tools and skills to help me deal with this.

But I am broken.

I am sad.

I am feeling small and unloveable.

I'm asking for prayer.

I need to seek GOD in this, He is the only help for me in this situation.

Help Me GOD! HELP ME! Help my unbelief!

The Cross and the Resurrection

Happy Easter!

My heart and soul are filled with joy as I contemplate on the wonders of my salvation. I Love Easter...single handedly it is the holiday that I feel the most deeply in my soul. You see my friends, it's more than eggs and candy, its more than fun and family it's LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

But to truly grasp that life there was Death. Painful, humiliating, wrenching death of a criminal. Yet the person dying was not a criminal, no he was perfect. PERFECT! Not self righteous, not full of pride, a perfect man, SINLESS, never committing the pettiness that plague you and I, never being unjust in anger, a Perfect, Sinless Man. Yet he died. Not because he deserved to die, not because he had done anything wrong, but for ME...and YOU. He DIED to pay the penalty for all the wrongs we do...the wrongs of bad attitudes, bad habits, driving to fast, telling lies, thinking the wrong things, for those selfish motives and all the petty things we hold on too. The Bible tells us that ALL have sinned. There is nothing good in us, NOTHING...we are wretched, sinful creatures. And we would be left wallowing in our filth and despair if it weren't for JESUS... JESUS died for my sins and for you. He suffered and was humiliated so that we can be reconciled to God, so that we can be his Children! So to grasp the Life of Easter you must accept the Death of a Savior...the Perfect Sacrifice.

Then there is LIFE..the stamp of Approval of a Holy God to say YES! The price is paid and you can be forgiven. There is HOPE in knowing that the one who gave themselves as a sacrifice paid for my redemption with his blood and is ALIVE, sitting at the Right hand of the Father, interceding for you and me. There is a Savior, he accomplished what he said, he is the fulfillment of all the Prophesy's and HE will Reign forever on HIGH! His Sacrifice was enough, nothing more is needed except to believe in the Lord Jesus Christ and you will be saved!

So Friend, are you full of joy today because of what Jesus has done for you? Have you accepted His Sacrifice for the wrong doings you do and to you trust him for your Salvation. There is no other way, it is the Death and Resurrection of Jesus that changed the course of History and is the MOST SIGNIFICANT event Ever! It's so important! I have accepted this gift and I am filled with Joy knowing that My Savior lives and is working to Change me into who he wants me to be!

HAPPY EASTER!!!! WE HAVE HOPE BECAUSE OF THE RESURRECTION!!!!!!!!!!!

Running not Racing

I like to win.

I like being right.

I'll freely admit that I am a highly competetive person. I like to be first, I like to be right, I like to be the best. I HATE being wrong. I Hate it with my whole soul. It wounds me deeply and makes me feel like a big fat failure. I like getting recognized for the work I do and I like Praise.

I'm dealing with a situation where I work. I have a challenging student this year. He is a sweet little boy but he has issues....Big issues, and try as I might I feel like I am losing the battle with this student. Every technique, every strategy, every idea that I have works for like a day and then blows up in my face.

I ask for help or the ability to speak to someone who might be able to help with the situation and I am met with walls, and excuses. I never receive a thank you or a pat on the back for good days, and I am met with resistance on bad ones.

I've been studying the book of Hebrews. And the part where the author talks about running the race, with such a cloud of witnesses around us cheering us on. It's such an encouragement to know that there are other believers, others around me who are dealing with similar situations, who have dealt with the same challenges and have come out on the winning side. I don't have to win this one, I don't have to be right, I don't have to Fix this problem...I can't do that. I have to run and be the best teacher that I can be for this little boy. I need to dedicate my time not to focusing on the negative but the positives. To embrace the situation head on. To focus on loving this little boy the way Christ loves me with all my faults and problems. I have to run the race set before me....not to win the prize but to please God. I need to give my issues to HIM...I need to be open before HIM and let HIM work through me. It's not racing for a Prize or a Victory but running through my Christian life and working on being more of who my Savior wants me to be, a reflection of the one who died and gave his life for me, not because He wanted a prize but because it was the act of a Loving God.

I Guess I Overreacted.

So my co-workers got me this on Monday for my birthday! This is what they actually were doing instead of going for a hamburger. That was the cover story...since they didn't think I'd care. OOOPS....thanks girls! Sorry that I got so mad...I'm blaming PMS....Love you all!

A New Blog

I've decided that I need a second blog...one just for me.

This is going to be an account of how I am going to change my thinking from being a MESSY person to a person who has her household more under control.

It's going to be a place where I can write my frustrations and joys when I have accomplished a new goal.

It's come out of my New Year's Resolution. My goal for this year is to have my house cleaner, more organized more undercontrol than I did on the first day of 2010. So I have 364 days to accomplish my goal.

I am needing a way to be accountable to this goal and blogging is going to be my tool.

Come and join me on my journey from being an out of Control Messy Person to someone who has her home life undercontrol and her house her true castle and retreat.